Noting wey man no go see and hear for dis our Naija. Lagos own na im be number one sef.

Yesterday morning, as I comot for my house for Abule Egba, say make I begin dey go our garage wey dear for near Ikeja under bridge, na im one madam stop me dat early morning. E say make I carry am for drop go Apapa Wharf.

I tell am say sebi e sabi as dat Wharf road dey now, say di kind traffic wey all dis trailer dem wey dey park for road everywia dey cause for dat road, no be small ting. I tell di madam say na im make we dey charge double money now for dat road.

Di madam say im know, dat no be we cause am nah. E say im pikin wey dey for America send am motor, so na im make e wan go do clearing for Wharf. E say if no be so, wetin for carry am go dat road? I tell am my price, e gree.

True, true, since dat early morning wey I carry dat madam, na around 12 o’clock pm in di afternoon we reach Wharf. Tori Olorun!

I remember say Jimoh, our union branch chairman don talk am tele tele say we go get meeting dat yesterday afternoon. And na me be Akowe, so no how wey I go take dodge di meeting.

As I jus drop di madam for Wharf, na im I turn kia kia begin run dey go Ikeja.

Wen I reach garage, all our union member dem don siddon for di meeting, dem dey wait for me Akowe. I tell dem sorry, say na Apapa Wharf I go drop passenger, and everybody sabi as dat road be.

Meeting don start be dat. Jimoh say na only one agenda dey for di day, and dat agenda na im plan to go enter gofment house for Abuja as Honourable in 2023.

I look our Treasurer Idowu, Idowu look Akpan, Akpan look Emeka, Emeka look Jimoh. E come be like say all of us drink one drum of Lookozade.

Jimoh say wetin make everybody jus dey look anya anya, say weda na new ting make person enter politics.

Di next ting be say, everybody jus begin laugh at di same time.

Jimoh vex! E say weda e rob shit for body wey make all of us take am do yeye.

Na dat time me as Akowe of di union stand up. I tell Jimoh make e no vex as we dey laugh. I say no be im we dey laugh, but dat na someting in someting make someting to do someting.

I say dis honourable wey im wan be by 2023, we like am well well, and we go support am gidigba, atlist make our union member follow dem dey for Abuja.

But I come talk am say, me Oga MAT, atlist I go night school for my village for Ogbomosho reach Standard 5 before I run come Lagos as Arike papa wan take African Insurance finish me say na me give im pikin, Arike belle.

I come ask Jimoh say you, you no even break chalk one day for your life, not to talk of to go ordinary night school. So which certificate you wan take become Honourable for Abuja.

Everybody for meeting come laugh again, and Jimoh come vex more, more.

Jimoh shout for my head. E say, “Oga MAT sit down! Na rubbish question you ask. Wetin concern school and certificate with di Hounorable wey I wan be?

“Na certificate we go chop? If I take my picture and do affidavit go give dem for Abuja, se dat one no do? Abi na today una come Naija? E be like say all of una don dey craze!”

Olorun Oba o! As Jimoh dey curse us, na im all our union member dey comot one by one. By di time e talk finish, e see say na only im remain for di meeting.

I no blame Jimoh. No be im fault.

Make we jam again on Friday.

Tank you.

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.