Noting sweet like wen you dey do someting, people like am and even tell you say dem like am. I swear!

Since dat day wey I nack una di tori say I wan stop dis my taxi driver work as BRT, Lagbus, Uber, Taxify, Gokada and Opay don carry all our passenger dem go, na so everybody come dey beg me make I no lef taxi driver work.

Na so dem dey bring letter come our garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge. Plenty of dem no get my phone number, my battery for don hear nwi by now.

My guonguoro boot don full trowey with letter. And all di letter beg me say make I no change my work. I say make I show una just some of di letter dem:

Dear Oga MAT,

Di order day, you nack us di tori how you dey plan to change work. Oga MAT, why? Wia you wan lef us your people go? Abeg no try am o, unless you wan carry dead body for your guonguoro boot. So you wan go begin drive Uber, Taxify or Opay so dat you no go get time dey nack us your sweet, sweet tori again? I no gree o. Instead I ready to contribute money make you take upgrade your guonguoro.

Tank you.

Na me your broda wey anoder mama born,

Enyinna Osakwe.

Oga MAT,

Abeg dat ting wey you talk di order day, make e be say na play o. How you go talk say you wan change work? Wetin yougo come dey do nah? Who go come dey drive your guonguoro? And who go dey nack us di sweet tori wey you dey nack us about wein dey happen for Lagos road? Abeg no try am o. If na money be your troublem, tell me, I go arrange bank loan for you. But you go promise me say wen di money enter your hand, you no go take am go marry second wife.

Na me your friend,

Rose Michael.

Dear Oga MAT,

I live in the US. I read the story last week when you said you’re considering a change of job because of the economic situation in the country as it affects your profession. My candid advice is that you continue with what you know how to do best. I am sure you are not less than 70 years old (Judging from the fact that you claim to have run away to Lagos from your village when you were in Standard 5 in 1963). So what other work do you think you can do at your present age? Better continue with the taxi driver work. I must confess I always enjoy reading your hilarious stories every edition.

Thank you.

Sani Mustapha.

My beloved Oga MAT,

I do pray for you always and will continue to do so as you put your taxi on the road every day. I read the story where you complained about reduction of passengers. I want to tell you that even those new transportation systems you are envying – Uber, Taxify, Gokada, Opay, etc - are not finding it easy in the present economic situation in the country. In fact, no business is having a smooth ride. So just continue to do what you are doing. You are the best in your trade, keep it up. The good Lord will continue to direct, protect and provide for you and your family. It is well with you.

Your keen follower,

Evangelist Olugbenga Bamiduro.

Oga MAT,

Wetin you dey nyan sef? You say you wan change job? Abeg forgot dat matter, tink anoder ting. Which work you tink say e easy? If you park your guonguoro and you no quick see anoder work, wetin go come happen to you and your family? How your wife Bose and your two woman pikin dem – Bisi and Funke – go come do? Wia you go see money to dey pay your landlord, Baba Braimoh, for di face-me-I-face-you house wey you dey live for Abule Egba? Abeg no suffer your family, jus relax and continue to dey nack us your sweet, sweet tori about all di ting wey dey shele for Lagos road.

Abiodun Komolafe,

Oga MAT,

If you lef taxi driver work, wetin go come happen to all dose Lagos sisi dem? Sebi your wife Bose don kukuma talk am tele tele say your work na ashewo work. Abi you don tire to dey carry all dose your akproka sisi dem wey full for Lagos road? Sikiratu and Aisha nko, who go come dey service dia boysquarters? Abeg no cause heart attack o.

Your secret sisi,

Lovina.

My people, na wetin I go come talk nah.

Make we jam again on Tuesday.

Tank you.

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.