S-I-K-I-R-A-T-U !

My people, how una take enjoy dat Xmas day gan? I sure say una do am well. Noting sweet like make man pikin just balance for one corner with im babe for dis odun.

Na di kind ting wey I been wan do be dat for dat Xmas day, but Sikiratu no call me for phone as e promise. As I no see Sikiratu call, na im me I come dey call am ti ti ti ti. I call am sote my phone battery quench. I tell my family say make I run go buy petrol make we take enjoy di Xmas.

Na so I come pour di fuel, put on di “I better pass my nebor” generator wey I don buy even before my first woman pikin Bisi born. I come dey charge my phone. Bisi and Funke dey for kitchen dey helep dia mama to cook Xmas food.

As I siddon for parlour dey tink of Sikiratu, I no know wen sleep carry me. I come dey dream how me and Siki Babe just dey do lovi lovi like couple wey dey for honeymoon before Bose come wake me up.

Bose say since wen I siddon for di chair dey sleep, na so so fiom, fiom, fiom I just dey do for mouth. E ask me who I dey kiss for dream. Na dat time I come dey do like say I dey snore well well, I no want miss dat sweet dream. Bose na witch o. Why dis woman want stop my enjoyment half way? Tori Olorun!

Small time, Bose tap me for my shoulder, e say make I wake up, say di Xmas food go soon ready. I no mind am, E say e no go better for dat mami water spirit wey I dey kiss for inside dream. My wife come dey cast and bind. E come dey curse all di demon and evil spirit dem wey dey for dis world. Bisi and Funke come join dia mama to cast and bind. Dis people spoil my sweet dream patapata. My mind spoil, no be small.

Na im I come stand up and look my phone, disaster battery charge small. I look time, na 4 O'clock pm in di evening. Why Sikiratu do me dis kind ting nah? And na im been take im mouth talk say make we do Xmas togeder o.

As I dey tink, small time I come dey hear somebody knock for door pom, pom, pom, pom. Bisi rush go open di door and close di door back quick. E talk say na one man like dat with goatie bie bie dey for door.

I go out, I no sabi di person wey I see. As e remain only me outside, my visitor take im hand push im bie bie small, den use di order hand remove di cap for im head and di dark glass for im eyes.

Di next ting wey comot for my mouth na S-i-k-i-r-a-t-u !!!

So dis buka girl take style clone imsef like man, come meet me for my house for Xmas day? Olorun Oba o!

-to be continued.

Make we jam again on Tuesday.

Happy Xmas and a mary new year in advance.

Tank you.

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.