My new year swear

Posted by News Express | 31 December 2019 | 811 times

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One ting wey I dey always like wen new year wan show face be say,  everybody go begin make new year swear.

One person go swear say, for dis new year wey we wan enter so, I no go do dis and dat again. Anoder person go say, for dis new year o, I go double all my effort to get dis and dat. Na orisirisi swear you go hear people dey swear.

Dem dey call am New Year Reso… so… solu… Chaaii! Abeg helep me make I know bite my tongue. But me I call am new year swear.

Yesterday, na so I carry three bobo like dat for drop go Lawanson. Dem no even allow di new year to land, na im di three both of dem begin dey hala.

Na di one wey siddon for passenger seat for front start am. Di bobo jus see one man tanda for Anthony Bus Stop for Ikorodu Road dey blow cigar. Na im e talk say, “Tufiakwa!”

Di one wey siddon for di owner seat of my guonguoro ask am say, “Chibuike, wetin be dat?” Chibuike say, “Emeka, you know see dat man wey tanda dey blow cigar under dis hot sun for dat Anthony bus stop wey we jus pass?”

Na im di bobo wey siddon behind my seat come ask Chibuike say, “How di cigar wey di man dey blow for bus stop take concern you? You wey dey finish one packet for one sitting nko?”

Emeka say, “Obinna, you dey mind am? Chibuike na pot wey dey call kettle black.”

“Na una sabi all dat one wey una dey talk. Me I don make up my mind say from dis new year, I no go near cigar sam, sam,” Chibuike swear.

Come see as Emeka and Obinna begin laugh Chbuike. Dem say na every year Chibuike dey talk say e wan lef cigar, after one month, na so e go begin smoke again. And e go smoke to cover di one month wey e no smoke.

Chibuike tell Emeka and Obinna say na dem sabi. E say make dem continue to laugh am, say dis time e don make up im mind. E tell dem say if dem ever see cigar for im hand from dis new year till forever, make dem do am anyting dem like. Di wey e take talk am, you go see say di bobo serious gan.

Obinna come talk say, if Chibuike fit stop cigar for dis life, im sef swear say from dis new year, e no go ever touch Alomo, Baby Oku, Monkey Tail, or anyting like dat again. E say if dem see am drink dat kind ting again, make dem do am anyting dem like.

Emeka say im own o, im sabi say na anyting wey dey wear skirt be im wahala. But for dis new year, im wan go dia village go carry wife come Lagos make im eye comot for all dis Lagos sisi dia body. E say if dem see am carry ashewo come house again from dis new year, make dem do am anyting dem like.

By dis time, we don pass Ojuelegba, entire Itire Road for Surulere. As we reach Lawanson, dem pay me and di three both of dem come down.

Na im I turn my guonguoro, begin dey go back to our garage wey dey near Ikeja under bridge.

As I dey go for road, I come dey tink wetin be my own swear for dis new year.

Quick, quick I remember four tings…

(To be continued)

Make we jam again on Friday.

Tank you,

Tank you very much.

And tank you very, very much indeed.


Source: News Express

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