Fidelity bank banner Bayelsa State banner
The quest and the treasure, By Onyeka Onyeibor

By News Express on 23/08/2017

Share on facebook Yahoo mail icon Gmail icon Share on Google+

Views: 747

I have a very competitive son. A game of tennis is only good if he wins, and always bad when he loses. Against his elder brother, he loses often. Every loss brings him a long tear. 

Every victory brings him a radiant smile. I watch with little interruption his expression of both extremes of emotion. How do I teach him at 10 to be magnanimous in victory and graceful in defeat? A quote in the Looney Tunes cartoon came to the rescue: ‘It Is The Quest, Not The Treasure’.

Quest is desire. Treasure is crown. Quest is what we give. Treasure is what we receive. One of life’s greatest mysteries is that victory is not to the strongest, the boldest or the fastest. Life often does not give what we demand, desire or deserve. If that is true, what is the point in striving? Should we stop demanding, desiring or deserving? No! It is tragic to engage life with less energy and less enthusiasm than we possibly can. 

Treasure is important. Who the quest makes us is more important. A degree certificate is good. Its quest brings the virtue of devotion, discipline and diligence. Of what benefit is a certificate when learning is not evident? It is quest that gives meaning to treasure.

Victory moves our soul to dance. It makes us feel good, well and worthy. Many will covet that spotlight of excellence and the illusion of superiority it confers. Winning may mean I am better than the other. If I am better, I am good. Defeat is the reverse side of victory.

It leaves us sad, isolated and bitter. We often appropriate victory to ourselves. I made it! Capital I. We disburse defeat to others – “the teacher gave me F9.” 

In defeat, the illusion of comparison also applies. A damaged window doesn’t look too bad if the gale that broke it blew off my neighbour’s roof. But how does the size of the other man’s misery scale up my joy. If I am hungry, finding a man who is hungry and homeless, a situation undeniably worse than mine, brings me no comfort.

Man thrives in comparison. Joy and sorrow are not absolute.  We evaluate both in relation to the people around us. The danger with comparison is that it provides single dimensional view of relative performance. Purpose and potential are not in the menu.  Winning a 100-metre race is victory. Winning a 100-metre race in 11 seconds, when you can do so in 9 seconds, is suboptimal. Winning it in 9 seconds, when your purpose in life is orchestra is less-fulfilling. 

The Loony quote taught my son that all that matters is not the end. He must compete. He must do all he can. He must desire victory, but always remember that full effort is full victory. If he must compare, it must be with his personal best, and not the other lad. Comparison with others is the mother of all grief. The richer man’s gold should not make him sad. The poorer man’s misery should not make him glad. He must learn that the goal of contest is not victory over others, but victory over self. The ultimate victory is to be the best he can, to rise as many times as he falls. There is no defeat for sunrise, and no end for hope. 

Today, no matter how the game ends, he walks to the other side of the table to shake hands, and two brothers will say in unison: It is the quest, not the treasure!

Onyeibor wrote in from Lagos.

Source News Express

Posted 23/08/2017 3:39:04 PM

 

Share on facebook Yahoo mail icon Gmail icon Share on Google+


 

CLASSIFIED ADS

REVEALED: 3 natural ways to get stronger erections, last 25 minutes on bed, and increase manhood size without using drugs. Also, Natural Prostrate Enlargement Remedy.. Get In HERE...

 

You may also like...
North-West APC leaders laud Osinbajo

Expensive sex: Franck Ribery and Karim Benzema face...

World leaders gather at UN headquarters to sign...

SystemSpecs on course to global ICT hall of...

Tinubu, a fearless political strategist — Gbenga Daniel...

NBS releases details of 2016 fourth quarter performance...

Why Ebonyi people gave Umahi sole ticket for...

Trump’s plans endanger economies around the world, IMF...

Chaplain dismisses reports on closure of Aso Villa...

Boko Haram kills 11 in Yobe, takes over...

US: Undocumented people seek sanctuary in churches

Boko Haram kingpin surrenders; 2 spies fall into...

 

Latest News Soldier kills 13-year-old school boy in Ondo Abandoned Projects: EFCC goes after Niger Delta contractors Policeman killed as Shiites continue protest against El-Zakzaky's detention Russia 2018: Pastor demands money to pray for Super Eagles’ win over Iceland 2018 Budget: South East senators express shock over reported cuts Nigerian banks lose N12.30bn to fraud in 4 years – NIBSS Auditor’s Report: NASS to sanction erring MDAs APC Convention: APC diaspora members throw weight behind Oshiomhole as new party chairman Again, court dismisses serial fraudster, Emmanuel Nwude’s application for bail Egypt to open defence office in Abuja Fake eye surgeon in police net World Cup: Saraki, others to watch Super Eagles against Iceland in Volgograd

 

Most Read Nigerian female sex addict opens up, says ‘I like it with both men and women’ (352,354 views) NUDE PHOTO OF OMOTOLA JALADE-EKEINDE surfaces online (351,744 views) Shameless Genevieve Nnaji exposes breasts in public (280,306 views) Finally named: The full list of friends of Nigerian female sex addict who prowled Facebook (230,159 views) Igbo scholar disgraces Femi Fani-Kayode •Demolishes claims on Igbo/Yoruba history with facts and figures (209,107 views) OLUMBA OLUMBA OBU (the one who called himself God) IS DEAD (208,830 views) Breaking News: POPULAR REVEREND CONVERTS TO ISLAM in Kaduna (Nigeria) (181,861 views) OBJ’s son reported dead in Lagos plane crash •Names of more victims emerge (163,964 views) THE FINAL DISGRACE: Igbo scholar unleashes more facts about Igbo/Yoruba history, finishes off Femi Fani-Kayode with second article (153,962 views) My wasted years in Olumba Olumba Obu’s Evil Brotherhood (148,664 views) Lagos plane crash: Journalist releases victims’ names (143,879 views) Gunmen kill ASP, 2 other police officers in vain bid to kidnap Rivers PDP chieftain (135,702 views)

 

Categories Advertorials (3) African Press Organisation (81) Art & Literature (50) Business & Economy (3,261) Business Verdict (44) Columnists (870) Complaints & Requests (94) Enterprise & Opportunities (207) Entertainment (505) Features (607) Global Business Monitor (283) International (2,045) Interview (154) Live Commentary (28) Love Matters (124) News (36,383) Opinion (1,004) Pidgin (10) Politics (5,299) Religion (771) Sports (1,555) Stock Watch (30) AMA & Al Jazeera Global Update

 

CBN banner

Firstmobile banner

 

 

NEWS EXPRESS TV

Portugal v Spain 2018

 

APO Group Partner

 

 

CLASSIFIED ADS

GOCOP Accredited Member

GOCOP Accredited member

 

 

Africa Media Agency and Al Jazeera

Advertisement